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Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Old Bridge New Jersey Woman, 600 pound Donna Simpson, says she Hopes To Achieve 1000 Pounds!

Oh WOW! This is really fantastic! This lady is super cool!!! I think I'm in love! But she's already spoken for because she's married. Oh well.

Now this is what THE BIGGEST FATTEST BLOG is all about.


Donna Simpson already weighs about 600 pounds, but she is determined to nearly double her present size to become the world's fattest woman. The 42-year-old mother from Old Bridge New Jersey is set on reaching for the 1,000lb mark in just two years. Remarkably she insists she is healthy, despite now needing a mobility scooter when she goes shopping.

Donna Simpson already weighs 600 pounds but
is consuming an astonishing 12,000 calories a day
in her quest to become the world's fattest woman

'My favorite food is Sushi, but unlike others I can sit and eat 70 big pieces of Sushi in one go,' she said. 'I do love cakes and sweet things, doughnuts are my favourite.' Donna, who wears a Size 7XL dress, eats mounds of junk food and tries to move as little as possible. Ms Simpson already holds the Guinness World Record as the world's fattest mother, when she gave birth in 2007 weighing 532 pounds.

She needed a team of 30 medics to deliver her daughter Jacqueline during a high-risk Cesarean birth. Yet although she can only move 20ft before needing to sit down, she wants to be come even bigger. 'I'd love to be 1,000 pounds,' she said. 'It might be hard though. Running after my daughter keeps my weight down.'

Ms Simpson can no longer walk more than 20 feet before
she needs to sit down. She goes out to do all of her grocery
shopping in an electric battery powered mobility scooter

You might expect that her long-term partner Philippe, age 49, to advise her to slim down, but instead he encourages her to eat more. He met Donna on a dating site for plus-size people and is a self-confessed fat admirer, although he himself only weighs 150lbs. 'I think he'd like it if I was bigger,' said Donna. 'He's a real belly man, and completely supports me.' To achieve her goal, Donna says she will need to eat up to 12,000 calories a day (the average woman should consume only 2,000.) To fund the massive $750 weekly food shop, she runs a website where men pay her to watch her eat fast food.

Donna's weight problem began early. Her mother made big meals for Donna and her brothers and gave them lots of treats and fattening food. By the time Donna was nine, she weighed 182 pounds. 'Food was her way of showing she loved us, she wanted us to eat, and she was very protective of us,' Ms Simpson said. 'She wouldn't let anyone say anything bad to us about our weight. She would argue with doctors who said it was dangerous.'

Donna Simpson poses for a photograph with her little
daughter, Jacqueline. It took 30 medics to deliver her

Donna's mother died soon after, and her dad married a woman who put the children on a strict diet. 'I used to steal food from the cupboards, which were still full because my mum used to store food,' she said. But as she got older, Donna began to worry about her weight and started taking diet pills. Between the ages 14 and 18 she slimmed down to 11 stone, but was still unhappy.

'Dieting just made me miserable because I was thinking about food all the time.,' she said. After she left school, Donna got a desk job and no longer felt the need to fit in with other girls. 'I felt so much better when the weight came back,' she said. 'It felt like who I was meant to be.' When Donna was 19 she met her first husband, who worked as a chef at a steak restaurant. 'He worked night shifts and would come home at 2 or 3 AM and bring the leftovers with him,' she said. 'We'd stay up and eat huge piles of steak, mashed potatoes, and gravy with butter. 'I started gaining weight quickly and my husband liked it. 'He said I was sexier when I was bigger, and I felt happier too.'

When she was 27, Donna weighed 350 pounds, and fell pregnant with her eldest son, Devin. Her marriage ended soon after and she turned to food for comfort. By the age of 31, she weighed 602 pounds and decided to try and lose weight. She lost 70 pounds in six months and was due to have a gastric band operation.

But just before she was due to go under the knife, her friend died during a similar operation. 'That was a sign for me,' Ms Simpson said. 'I decided it just wasn't worth it. I like being the way I am.' Donna, then 518 pounds, came across a website which celebrated obese women.

When she admitted her real size, Donna was flooded with emails from men. 'They sent me gifts through the post, like protein shakes to help me put on weight faster,' she said. And she unrepentant of her weight-gain goal, despite risking her own life in the process. 'I love eating and people love watching me eat,' she said. 'It makes people happy, and I'm not harming anyone.'


Super-size Donna Simpson has found a bizarre way to turn her passion for food into money. Hundreds of men pay to watch online as 630 pound Donna scoffs vast amounts of burgers, pizza, crisps and cakes in an attempt to hit her target weight of 1,000 pounds.

Since setting up her website last November, Donna, who squeezes into size 40 clothes, has already attracted 260 subscribers and their fees net her an impressive $3,000 dollars a month – which she spends on food.

Donna, who’s 39 and 5 feet 4 inches, hopes to become one of the world’s heaviest women by consuming up to 12,000 calories a day. To reach her target, ex-carer Donna, who already suffers from diabetes and high-blood pressure, needs to gain another 378 pounds and predicts it will take her until 2012 at her current weight gain of 98 pounds a year. “I don’t know why my target is 1,000 pounds – it’s just the weight I believe I was born to be,” she says. Donna has been obese since childhood. By nine, she weighed 182 pounds – she was bullied at school and dubbed “Fatty four-eyes.”

At the age of 24 Donna married Robert Simpson, a chef who encouraged her eating by bringing home leftovers from work to feed her. “He’d come home with steak and desserts,” she recalls. “He liked me supersized.”

Robert – who was already a dad to son Sean, now 18 – and Donna had a child together, Devin, now 12, but divorced shortly after. By then Donna weighed 602 pounds. For the first time ever she went on a diet, urged on by her father who was concerned for her health, and lost 70 pounds in six months.

But she soon lapsed when she met fat-lover Philippe Gouamba, 47, in an online chat room for oversized women in 2006. “When I ate enough for five people on our first date, it really impressed him,” says Donna, from New Jersey, USA. Philippe, who counts watching his girlfriend eat as one of his favourite hobbies, says: “I’ve always been attracted to big women, but Donna is my fantasy. The more she weighs, the sexier she is.”

The couple, who plan to marry next year, say that Donna’s size makes their sex life even better. “Philippe goes on top so he can play with my fat belly,” says Donna. Regular gym-goer Philippe, who is 182 pounds and 6 feet 4 inches, also gets aroused by helping Donna, who is a bra size 56E, wash her rolls of fat in the shower.

Although doctors had said her 532 pound frame would make it almost impossible to conceive, Donna fell pregnant within three months of dating Phillipe. But she developed diabetes and high-blood pressure during pregnancy and needed a team of 19 doctors and nurses to get through the high-risk Caesarean birth.

When baby Jacqueline was born weighing 8lbs 14oz in February 2007, Donna became the world’s fattest woman to give birth – the previous largest had weighed 476 pounds. But she admits she struggles to care for her daughter, as she can barely walk 20ft without needing to sit down. “It’s difficult keeping up with Jacqueline, but we’re very closely bonded,” says Donna. “Fortunately, anything I can’t do with her, her dad can, so I don’t feel guilty.”

It was six months after giving birth that Donna resolved to become one of the world’s heaviest women by weighing 1,000 pounds. “I decided that if I was healthy enough to have a baby, then my body could cope with an extra 476 pounds,” says Donna. “It will be a great achievement – not many other people have reached that weight.”

And despite initial worries for Donna’s health, Philippe supports his fiancĂ©e. He says: “Gaining weight makes Donna happy and seeing her happy makes me happy.”

But when Donna’s ambition proved to be rather expensive, she had then decided to set up a website after discovering that there were men willing to pay to watch large women eat. “My food costs $613 dollars a week,” says Donna. “In a typical day I’ll eat four burgers and fries, a loaf of bread with peanut butter and jam, four servings of meatloaf and mashed potato, a large pizza, a chocolate cake with ice cream and cream, 12 cupcakes, two cheesecakes and fizzy drinks. And I don’t want Philippe to foot the bill just because I’m too big to go out and work.”

Donna charges $12 dollars a month for access to photos of her body and videos of her feasting and measuring her ever-expanding waistline. She has 260 “fat admirers” from as far away as Japan and Australia and their ages range from 20 to 68. She spends between six and 10 hours a day responding to emails or doing live chats online. And although she admits to getting some sexual requests, these are firmly ignored.

Human resources executive Philippe is supportive of Donna’s venture. He says: “I don’t mind other men looking at her because I’m the only one who touches her.” Since launching her web site, Donna has gained 98 pounds. Incredibly, she doesn’t care that reaching 1000 pounds will probably confine her to a wheelchair and could kill her, leaving her daughter – who she feeds a healthy diet – motherless.

“I’m well enough to cope with my target weight,” she says defiantly



Here's wishing her the very best. I for one, hope she is successful in achieving her goal of 1000 pounds. This is what we are all about!

Who knows! But perhaps after she has achieved her goal of 1000 pounds, she might even want to set a new record for the worlds heavies woman, Carol Yager who weighed about 1600 pounds at 5 feet 7 inches. Maybe she might even beat that record as well.

In fact, I would truly love to see some one achieve a weight of a full ton! That is 2000 pounds! I even hope someday that some one eventually weighs much more than a full ton! Now that is something I would really love to see!

The heaviest man on record was Jon Brower Minnoch who weighed about 1400 pounds at 6 feet 1 inch. So he was about 6 inches taller than Carol Yager and weighed 200 pounds less.

So, the heaviest women was 1600 pounds while the heaviest man was only 1400 pounds.



Stop pedophiles BOYCOTT AMAZON!


CG Brady said...

I was just over on Fat Bastard's blog and when I read your post Teddy I had to stop by and see for myself.

Do you think she will make 1000 lbs before she dies?

How do you suppose she can afford that much food? Obviously she can't work so is she on the public dole like you and so many other fatlings?

Teddy Bear said...

In response to CG Brady

"How do you suppose she can afford that much food? Obviously she can't work so is she on the public dole like you and so many other fatlings?"


Well, if you had read the article closely, it says . . .

"To fund the massive $750 weekly food shop, she runs a website where men pay her to watch her eat fast food."

So, she is making money through her web site. If guys are willing to pay money to watch her eat, then she's lot living of "the public dole" since she is making money.

Also, I believe in freedom of choice which had been denied me in the past.

I was not allowed to get a decent education in school and the first time I was suspended from school was because I failed to climb a stupid rope in the gymnasium. Never mind that I had a cripple up left knee, the result of a car accident when I was 4 years old, and never mind that I was doing well in all my academic subject.

No, PE and sports was more important to them than academics.

So, because I was denied my freedom, I will fight like Hell for the right to do as one please.

I say, if somebody enjoys being obese and would like to become more obese, then that's her right.


Rev. Lard Ass said...

In response to CG Brady as well,

She makes approximately $36,000 per year through her website. There are about 200 fat admirers who pay about $15 each month to see videos and pictures of her eating, and jiggling her fat, etc.

I think that she will make it past 1,000 lbs before all is said and done. With this latest bout of publicity I would expect that she will now have at least 2,000 monthly subscribers, and will therefore be making about $360,000 per year instead of $36,000 per year. So, that is enough money that she will be able to eat exactly what she wants with no regards for the price.

Also, I have read that a publisher is offering her a book deal which will have an advance in the five figure range, plus she will get royalties as well. I'm sure it will be a bestseller. And then I also read that there is talk of a reality TV show, which- if it is like John & Kate Plus 8, they were getting about $75,000 per episode. So, if she gets even $35,000 per episode, that will still be $560,000 per year if it is a 16 episode season. She even hired an agent, because she's getting so much media attention now. If my modest, realistic, low-end projections come true, she will be making almost $1,000,000 per year very soon.

So, are you jealous, CG Brady? Well, get used to it. Fat is going mainstream, and this is just the beginning. She is going to be one of the most influential and important people in the New Fat Acceptance Movement.

And about Teddy Bear- do not attack him for LEGALLY taking advantage of a LEGAL government program, Social Security Disability. And- not that this will matter to you- his weight has nothing to do with why he is on disability- he is disabled because of PTSD. And don't say that because someone is fat, they can't be on disability for non-fat-related disabilities, that is just stupid and BIGoted.

to be continued...

Rev. Lard Ass said...

To Teddy Bear,

Aren't you glad I mentioned her? I'm sure you would find her eventually anyway, or maybe you also found out about her on your own? But I am very glad that you had this reaction to the story, I thought of you immediately when I read about her and her valiant quest for four-digit glory. When you need a four-digit scale, that's when you know you've truly arrived!

I agree with you that after she reaches 1,000 lbs and becomes the heaviest woman alive, that the next natural step would be to go for the record of being the fattest woman who ever lived; which would require 600-something more pounds. Then, after that, it would be just another quick 400 pounds until Ton Status would be reached. Then, if she gained up to 2,205 pounds, she would weigh over 1,000 kilograms, which would get her more international attention because the rest of the world mostly uses the metric system. At 2,200 pounds, she would weigh 150 stones, which is what the Brits use to measure human body weights. (They officially use the metric system, but in real life, normal people still use the same system that we use, miles, pounds, etc, but for human weights they use stones, which are equal to 14 pounds.

I believe that it is unfair to deny people the right to live out their lives in ways that don't hurt other people. This means that I am against child molesters, because they hurt children, but I am not against gays marrying as long as they are adults. It also means that I am in favor of voluntary obesity and gaining.

The other day I said I was in favor of mandatory obesity, but I was just in the heat of the moment and I don't really believe that, although I do think we would be better off if people voluntarily chose to become morbidly obese, which many of us thankfully are. Morbid obesity is not for everyone- I recognize that now. But I think that it is for most people, and that as we get fatter, the social stigma will start to ease up, and then eventually it will begin to reverse itself, causing more and more people to WANT to become morbidly obese, to be cool, and to be like everyone else. At that point, when that happens, I will be the first in line to form the Thinling Defense Initiative and support Thinling Rights. (I will still be super-fat.) But for now, I am on the side of the oppressed massive masses- the fatlings.

I stand shoulder to shoulder with giants like Theodore Ursus, the Collosus of El Paso, aka the Texas Thinker; and Fat Bastard. Well, we can't stand shoulder to shoulder because our arms are so fat that our shoulders couldn't touch, but our arm fat could, and that is close enough. Point is- we are in favor of the basic human freedom to feed 'em.

When our ideas start to become more accepted, instead of PE classes wasting our school tax dollars, we will phase out gym/PE completely and push those funds into math, science, and art. If people want to play sports, they will be able to, but not at school. School is for learning, not chasing balls or climbing ropes- skills which have no value in the 21st century (or even the 20th century).


Rev. Lard Ass

Teddy Bear said...

Rev. Lard Ass said...

"And about Teddy Bear- do not attack him for LEGALLY taking advantage of a LEGAL government program, Social Security Disability. And- not that this will matter to you- his weight has nothing to do with why he is on disability- he is disabled because of PTSD. And don't say that because someone is fat, they can't be on disability for non-fat-related disabilities, that is just stupid and BIGoted."


Thank you Rev. Lard Ass for coming to my defense.

Yes, my disability has absolutely nothing to do with my weight.

I didn't start out in life being overweight. When I was a kid, I was not overweight. I didn't start becoming overweight until my teenage years.

I was 17 years old when I was beaten and raped by an older man, and the bullying I that I had received over the years added up, plus being denied a decent education.

When I turned 18 my mother helped me to apply for disability. After being beaten and raped I was so screwed up in my head I couldn't do anything. All I wanted to do was stay in my room where I felt safe.

So CG Brady seriously needs to shut the fuck up!

Yeah, over at the Fat Bastard's Bigger Fatter Blog in the topic titled . . .

"The Fat Tax Debate: Point Counter Point with CG Brady and Fat Bastard"

CG Brady had said the following:

"I think a dollar per pound on the federal tax would generate revenue and I think that it should extend to the children of fatlings. Let's say we have a family whose combined weight is 300 pounds over the limit then their tax bill should be three hundred dollars but perhaps a better way would be to provide a tax cut to thinlings who keep their BMI under 25."


Such a high tax would place poor families out in the streets.

I'm 5 feet 6 inches and about 400 pounds, so I'm 230 pounds over what is considered my ideal weight.

If I were charged a $230 dollar tax every month for being 230 pounds overweight, then I would not be able to pay my rent and I would be living in the streets!

Yet our society is willing to pay somebody with an IQ less that 20 who can't read or write beyond the 2ed graded level millions of dollars every year just to kick a football.

CG Brady is a Fascist Nazi scum!

I seriously wish that he would just shut the fuck up!

Rev. Lard Ass said...

The fat tax that CG Brady advocates is a very bad idea, for several reasons, which I shall now delineate.

1) The logistics of weighing everyone in the country. If you use the honor system, people will just lie. If you make a new gov't agency to weigh everyone every year, that will cost billions of dollars, and cancel out the funds raised by the fat tax, leaving only the negatives.

2) It is completely unfair to muscular people. Bodybuilders and the like weigh a lot more than normal people, but it isn't from fat, it's from muscle. The Governator's BMI probaby put him in the morbidly obese range back in the mid '70s, but he was not at all obese. So your plan punishes very muscular people.

3) Your plan punishes women for getting pregnant, because pregnant women weigh more. Also depending on what point of the pregnancy you measure her, her weight will fluxuate, so towards the end, she's going to weigh more than towards the beginning, just because of the fetus growing.

4) It discriminates against the poor, who cannot afford gym memberships or healthy organic hybrid solar powered green free range corn-fed hamburgers or whatever. Poor people have to eat cheap food, and the cheap foods make you fat.

5) You are going to push more people into deadly bariatric surgeries. This will literally kill people, because 1% or something die during the operation or shortly after it.

6) It is fascist. Just increase taxes on fast food and pizza, this way it affects all people equally, and the thinlings will have to suffer as well.

I am assuming CGbrady's fat tax would be $1 per extra pound, per year- not per month, right?

Anyway, those are my feelings.

Hmm, Teddy, I thought that for 5'6", the ideal weight would be about 125, (BMI of about 20), not 170 (BMI of 27.5, which is in the "overweight" category). I can't imagine you being just 125 pounds though!

As for me, my "ideal" weight would be about 180, because I am 6'7". I am fat AND tall. I have super-sized proportions!

Are you working on any new projects or articles, Big Dipper? I hope you are having a good 2010 so far!

Your friend in fatness,

Big Lard Ass (the Reverend)

Teddy Bear said...

Good evening Rev. Lard Ass

Thanks again for coming to my defense.

OK, you wrong about the height and weight. At 6 feet 7 inches and only 180 pounds, that would be way too thin.

How much one "should weigh" depends not only on height but on bone structure as well.

Sine I'm 5 feet 6 inches then:

Small Frame 136-142
Medium Frame 139-151
Large Frame 146-164

Now the chart I found does not go to 6 feet 7 inches. It only goes up to 6 feet 4 inches.

Height 6 feet 4 inches

Small Frame 162-176
Medium Frame 171-187
Large Frame 181-207

So for you at 6 feet 7 inches your "ideal" weight would be more than 180 pounds, perhaps closer to 200 pounds.

These are the ideal Weights according to the Metropolitan Life Insurance Company tables (1983)

Also back in the 1990s a BMI between 21 and 27 was considered normal and you weren't considered overweight until your BMI exceeded 27.

But then, a few years ago the WHO, World Health Organization set a new standard for what is to be considered a normal range, and now they saying that your BMI should be somewhere between 18 and 25, and now, anywhere over 25 is considered overweight.

Yeah, they just keep pushing the standard down lower. A Harvard University study suggested that a BMI greater the 23 should be considered overweight. The Professor who did the study was 6 feet 2 inches and only weighed 120 pounds.

I don't know why, but they just want to keep on pushing the standards down lower and lower.

The Fascist Nazi scum-bags who run the medical and health care system would prefer that we all weigh only about a pound which is the weight of one's ashes after being cremated.

Another words they would rather we all die thin than to live fat.

I say fuck 'em all.

They can all eat shit, crawl into a sewer, and die!

Fat Bastard said...


I think I have figured it out. Proud FA is one of this fat girl's cyber-feeders and he is afraid to tell me because he knows who much I want to see him marry the hot little thinling he is with. I suspect he has a case of the guilts.

That being said, Proud FA needs to start a cyber-feederism blog. I think he misses the feed. He loves watching people eat especially if they are BBW's.

I am going to defend CG for a minute. He's another mother hen like MeMe Roth and as you know I burn for that skinny stick girl.

It was also CG who I credit with saving my life. When I was nearly killed by a comedy of medical blunders it was Dr Brady who helped to pick up the pieces. I would have lost considerably more weight if I had tried to cram down food the way I used to after they fucked me up in the hospital. He got my digestive system working again and he hooked me up the the right doctors who helped me get back on the mend. He also got me to a shrink you diagnosed me with having PTSD due to the terror I experienced at the hands of our health care system. If we win the case I will get a lot more money because of Dr Brady. In spite of our philosophical differences the man has been great to me and I believe he saved my life. At one point because of all the meds and all the pain and trauma is became suicidal. I am back to normal and getting better.

I offered and my family offered him money but he refused to take any. He also slam dunked a doctor who was advocating WLS for me and reported that quack to the medical board. CG Brady is more anti- WLS than anyone I know. He actually cares about us fatlings even though he sometimes has a funny way of showing it but when the chips were down he stuck by me and I am a better man for it.

As much as a disagree with him on some things I love him like a brother.

Rev. Lard Ass said...

To Theodore Ursus, aka The Big Dipper,

I think you are right about the Body Mass Index thing. I know they have been changing the BMIs they recommend, and I guess I just thought a BMI of 20 was normal because that is what I have been told. To me, a BMI of 25, or even 28 is fine.

As for my frame, my actual bones have a narrow structure. I do not have a wide frame at all, and in high school I was the tall wiry guy, and I did wrestling (was very good at it, even made it to the state championship and got a trophy!) and also some basketball but I quit that after one season because I just had awful accuracy and I didn't like it that much.

I don't hate the people who make the BMI recommendations, but I do see where you are coming from. I think that you and I should put them on a strict feeding regimen until each of them weighs at least 300 lbs, and then we will see what they say about the acceptable BMIs are! Fat scientists are better than skinny scientists any day of the week!!

I'll whip up some of my famous octuple chocolate death brownies and tell the scientists to eat it, or else I will refuse to donate blood anymore. Us fat guys can donate tremendous amounts of blood, which can be a good source of income if your state allows you to get paid for donating blood. You can get like $50 every other week, which really adds up if you are on a tight budget.



Rev. Lard Ass said...

To Fat Bastard,

I am glad that my pastoral counseling has proved useful and helpful to you in your quest.

It is interesting that perhaps Proud FA is getting back into fatlings- he really sounded like he had no use for fat chicks anymore, and just only wanted to pork his one thinling from now on, for the rest of his life. Ugh. Fat chicks need loving, I'm sorry- I think if you're into fat chicks, do them a favor and marry one, or at least pork them. Although fat chicks have higher self esteem, it is usually harder for them to get laid and get married to quality-looking guys.

I don't think that CGBrady is a bad guy at all. I just disagree with him passionately about things like the fat tax, and such. I am also in favor of feederism and gainerism, whereas he is not. But we are both against weight loss surgery, and are both in favor of people being healthy and happy.

I judge people mostly by what they do, instead of by what they say. And it seems like CGBrady has been there for you when you needed him the most- when you were near-death. He wants to save your life, and he is working towards that goal, and so are you- so, I like CGBrady. This doesn't mean we will always agree, but I do respect him as a good guy, just like I'm sure he respects me and my efforts to get healthier.

My heart attack was a real wake-up call, y'know?

Anyways, glad to hear that you are doing well and everything. And I am jealous that you are eating a dove chocolate ice cream bar! Yum!

-Rev. Lard Ass

Fat Bastard said...

CG and I have had some very heated debates but because he's not a angry fat girl he is able to see both sides.

Rev, your counsel has been most helpful and has Teddy's.

I think PFA is thinking about porking a fatling and I think he is fighting the urge. They come on to him all the time. They throw themselves at him. His skinny girlfriend is a real sweetie. I hope they work things out.

Fat Bastard said...

Proud FA is still ducking my calls but I think he is reading my BF blog. Next time you stop by could you please say something to him Teddy or Rev? He speaks very highly of you two and maybe your words can get through to him.


Fat Bastard

Lard Ass said...

Dear Theodore Bear,

I wonder how Donna Simpson is doing on her weight gain quest. I think it is very hot when a woman is willing to sacrifice her mobility in exchange for more SSBBW beauty. There was a fat woman from one of the "Jackass" movies who pretended to give birth to a midget; she weighs like 650+ lbs, which is very nice. She can hardly walk, and she has to turn to her side in order to get out of her bathroom- and even then she has to struggle to push her belly through. Then she waddles into the next room and thuds down on the couch, exhausted and winded from the massive effort.

How is your Jazzy working out for you? Has it made you more sedentary and helpless? Do you feel your muscles wasting away under all of your fatty flesh?


Rev. Lard Ass

Rev. Lard Ass said...

Okay, I am FURIOUS now.

Are you sitting down? (Of course you are, standing is too much like work and burns too many calories compared to sitting, which is more comfortable.)

Well, I just now read that some doctor or someone like that is offering Donna Simpson $50,000 to undergo weight loss surgery (plus the cost of the surgery, I think). I think this might even deserve a follow-up article.

What self-respecting gainer would take $50,000 to have WLS? That is sick and crazy.


Teddy Bear said...

Good afternoon Reverend Lard Ass.


"Well, I just now read that some doctor or someone like that is offering Donna Simpson $50,000 to undergo weight loss surgery (plus the cost of the surgery, I think). I think this might even deserve a follow-up article.

What self-respecting gainer would take $50,000 to have WLS? That is sick and crazy."

End Quote:

Yes, this is an outrage!

I would never undergo WLS, Weight Loss Surgery, even if they offered me a million dollars!

I love and cherish every pound of fat on my body. I love being fat because it feels so nice and soft and comfortable, and it protects me from this cold hard world we live in.

Also Donna Simpson's food habit is not costing us anything at all. She's making $3,000 per month from her web site, and how she spend her own money, which she has earned for herself from her web site.

Also, she's earning enough money from her website to put her daughter through college.

So, I say let her be! She's not harming anyone.

Lard Ass said...

Dear Theodore Ursus,

I have found an interesting article in the Wall Street Journal that I think you would be interested in. It basically says that the traditional formula of 3,500 calories = 1 pound is not a linear thing. According to traditional thought, if you increase your daily caloric intake by 100, you will gain 10 lbs per year, so in 30 years you will gain 300 lbs just by having 2/3 a can of soda per day, plus your normal food.

You and I both know that this just isn't true. It doesn't make any sense in real life for such minor changes to have such huge, permanent impacts. That's why gaining is not as easy as people think, and why people struggle to lose weight.

The article basically seems to say that the fat itself requires a significant amount of calories just to keep going, so over time, your weight would just level off with like, maybe a 5 or 10 or so pound gain, not 10 pounds per year for the rest of your life.

It goes on to say that Donna Simpson, who the "experts" predict will reach 1,000 lbs in just 7 months, would actually take more like 11 months at her current intake of 12,000 calories per day. Her goal is to get to 1,000 lbs within 2 years.

Here's the article:

So, what do you think about this?

Also, have you been weighed recently? Where do you go to weigh yourself? I wonder how Donna Simpson is going to get weighed, not that easy to weigh a 1,000 lbs woman.

I read about one fat man in the 1800s who was weighed by going onto a wagon, and then they measured how much the springs compressed when he was on it and marked it down. Then he got off the wagon, and they filled it up with rocks until it reached the same compression on the spring, and then they weighed the rocks individually to find out his weight. Pretty creative, huh?


Lard Ass

Fat Bastard said...

Just to keep you glorious pigs updated; Proud is still ducking my calls.

I just published another article called FAT PEOPLE RULE and it is begging for the insightful commentary of Teddy and the good Reverend. I mention you oinkers and point out your invaluable contributions to the evolution of the obese.

I went to an all you can eat place today and I laid waste to the desert bar. I probably ate a gallon of ice cream and I ate and entire plate of brownies. I would like a starved wild bear/boar. OINK!

Big Lard Ass said...

When is your next article coming out?

-Big Lard Ass

Teddy Bear said...

Big Lard Ass said...

"When is your next article coming out?"


I will be working on it some more tonight, and I hope to get it published by morning.

I have to edit a couple more pics, and I need to add an article on Cushing's Syndrome.

Teddy Bear

Proud FA said...

"Dr" Bear,

I wanted to stop by and let you know that I'm back and to thank you for your kindness and wise words to Fat Bastard. I wish to tell Reverend Big Lard Ass he same thing.

I was tough scrolling down the the comment section as pictures of fat girls trigger my porking instincts. OINK!

Fat Bastard and I are cool. He was very gracious as was my girlfriend Thinnette.

I have posted an explanation and my mia culpa on Bigger Fatter Blog.

Thank you again for your support. May Belly God bless you you big fat hungry bear!

Bellyboy said...

Damn, this is one big woman. I love the fact that she is trying to do what I have already achieved!